{"id":526,"date":"2012-02-29T00:57:36","date_gmt":"2012-02-29T08:57:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/?p=526"},"modified":"2012-02-29T00:57:36","modified_gmt":"2012-02-29T08:57:36","slug":"keeping-conversations-moving","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/2012\/02\/29\/keeping-conversations-moving\/","title":{"rendered":"Keeping conversations moving"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>With the Clementi case in the news, the shooting at a high school in Ohio, and the latest episode of <a class=\"zem_slink\" title=\"Glee\" href=\"http:\/\/www.tv.com\/shows\/glee\/\" rel=\"tvcom\" target=\"_blank\">Glee<\/a> highlighting how bullying leads to catastrophe, I asked myself what it takes to actually bring positive social change into the lives of kids today.<\/p>\n<p>You see, the adults have no idea how to react to a digitally connected world. I&#8217;m sure horrible things happened before MySpace, but I don&#8217;t know if they were nearly as viral or long lasting. On top of that, I think kids are just getting meaner. We are, so as not to hurt their feelings, being too nice to our kids. Their reaction is to be mean in return. It&#8217;s a bit bizarre and disheartening.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m glad that shows like Glee try to take on issues such as coming out of the closet, the lack of arts education in schools, and societal expectations of gender and roles. But I&#8217;m just not convinced that a 43-minute episode does enough to keep the conversation moving. We see it; we think to ourselves what a tragedy it represents; and then we move on to the next week&#8217;s episode.<\/p>\n<p>Somehow parents need to be empowered to engage their children in difficult conversations. We should start when kids are much younger before they are overburdened with puberty, confused about their own identities, and struggling to make a place for themselves in the world. Young children are much smarter than we give them credit for, and I think challenging them with reading, writing, and arithmetic needs to be supplemented by making them aware of how we are different, and why those differences make us a better society.<\/p>\n<p>I want my children to understand there is poverty, and that a middle class upbringing is not a right. I want my children to understand that there is race, and that because of it we stereotype and do harmful things to one another. I want my children to understand that someone can have two mommies or two daddies, and that that&#8217;s okay.<\/p>\n<p>But I want my children to be kids, and to be naive as long as possible. And I think that&#8217;s the wall that stops us from having those conversations.<\/p>\n<p>Between now and then, it sure would be nice to find a way to make it happen. I guess it&#8217;s one more thing to add to the to-do list.<\/p>\n<h6 class=\"zemanta-related-title\" style=\"font-size: 1em\">Related articles<\/h6>\n<ul class=\"zemanta-article-ul\">\n<li class=\"zemanta-article-ul-li\"><a href=\"http:\/\/r.zemanta.com\/?u=http%3A\/\/abcnews.go.com\/US\/wireStory\/parents-gay-suicide-victim-close-friends-15138528&amp;a=66101961&amp;rid=19d4dc73-17d0-4aa9-b7b5-200d5c72a269&amp;e=53bcf56353f1a4b03e58d9274eb077f2\" target=\"_blank\">Parents: Gay Suicide Victim Had No Close Friends<\/a> (abcnews.go.com)<\/li>\n<li class=\"zemanta-article-ul-li\"><a href=\"http:\/\/r.zemanta.com\/?u=http%3A\/\/www.cnn.com\/2012\/02\/28\/showbiz\/tv\/glee-trevor-project-ew\/index.html&amp;a=77833600&amp;rid=19d4dc73-17d0-4aa9-b7b5-200d5c72a269&amp;e=b32166b0ead6ba015722c62ccda1d62d\" target=\"_blank\">Last week&#8217;s &#8216;Glee&#8217; inspires record traffic for The Trevor Project<\/a> (cnn.com)<\/li>\n<li class=\"zemanta-article-ul-li\"><a href=\"http:\/\/parenting.blogs.nytimes.com\/2012\/02\/27\/school-shooting-is-another-opening-to-talk-about-guns\/\" target=\"_blank\">Motherlode Blog: Shootings in Ohio School Provide Another Opening to Talk About Guns<\/a> (parenting.blogs.nytimes.com)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<div class=\"zemanta-pixie\" style=\"margin-top: 10px;height: 15px\"><a class=\"zemanta-pixie-a\" title=\"Enhanced by Zemanta\" href=\"http:\/\/www.zemanta.com\/\"><img class=\"zemanta-pixie-img\" style=\"border: none;float: right\" src=\"https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/img.zemanta.com\/zemified_e.png?w=765\" alt=\"Enhanced by Zemanta\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/><\/a><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>With the Clementi case in the news, the shooting at a high school in Ohio, and the latest episode of Glee highlighting how bullying leads to catastrophe, I asked myself what it takes to actually bring positive social change into the lives of kids today. You see, the adults have no idea how to react [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"spay_email":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false},"categories":[64,1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pQyAq-8u","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":366,"url":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/2010\/07\/22\/juicing-for-a-cause-kind-of\/","url_meta":{"origin":526,"position":0},"title":"Juicing for a cause... kind of","date":"July 22, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"So as for the wedding planning, I have officially finished the music for the wedding. We're getting a lovely guitarist for the ceremony. We've asked her to play \"Somewhere over the Rainbow\" as the song to which Micky walks down the aisle. I hope it's a lively, and upbeat rendition.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Melih gets married&quot;","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1233,"url":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/2014\/07\/18\/a-new-tradition\/","url_meta":{"origin":526,"position":1},"title":"A new tradition","date":"July 18, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"The Friday evening pizza date. Before Micky and I got married, had kids, and officially became adults, we used to head over to Cavallaho Point on a Friday afternoon, watch the sun set over the Golden Gate Bridge, and have fancy appetizers and drinks. You stop doing that when there's\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Life Updates&quot;","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":946,"url":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/2014\/02\/22\/that-age-where-going-out-together-is-fun-again\/","url_meta":{"origin":526,"position":2},"title":"That age where going out together is fun again","date":"February 22, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Tonight we took the babies to the beach after their naps. This is my first new favorite thing about our location. We haven't really had the chance to urban hike Golden Gate park, and that would be next I think. Biking as a family third, but I digress. When we\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Fatherhood&quot;","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":932,"url":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/2014\/02\/18\/internet-free-zone\/","url_meta":{"origin":526,"position":3},"title":"Internet free zone","date":"February 18, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Micky and I don't get enough time together. We both work too much, put a lot of time into the kids, and generally find ourselves too exhausted to do much more. We need to figure out how to get better at it, but there's an epic impediment that I think\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;just thinking out loud&quot;","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":519,"url":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/2012\/02\/20\/observing-what-not-to-do-can-it-help\/","url_meta":{"origin":526,"position":4},"title":"Observing what not to do - can it help?","date":"February 20, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"We've just spent an amazing weekend on the shores of Capitola, CA. It's a really great, quiet, little beach town in Santa Cruz County. We made a full weekend of it. On Saturday, we swung by the Monterey Bay aquarium. While we were there, I heard a mother screaming at\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Fatherhood&quot;","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":886,"url":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/2014\/02\/07\/were-in\/","url_meta":{"origin":526,"position":5},"title":"We're in!","date":"February 7, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Today we moved into the house... finally :-) The day started whisking the kids off to school, and fitting in a call with <redacted> on my way over to the house (we are that big of a deal at TokBox). I was getting to the house for the Sonic.net guy\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Home ownership&quot;","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/526"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=526"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/526\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=526"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=526"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onvural.net\/melih\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=526"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}