Life Updates, Uncategorized 0 comments on Happy Birthday to my dad

Happy Birthday to my dad

She said, “You don’t look very handsome. You should wear a white shirt”

He said, “You know what? I have a white shirt with me.”

She watched as he buttoned up each button. When the one in the middle wouldn’t stay in place because the shirt only fit him 10 pounds ago he said, “You know there’s no one else in the world I would change into this shirt for.”

I said, “That’s the power of a woman”

But in this case it was just a little girl. A special girl. The granddaughter of the birthday boy. Who wore her special dress, flew to see Dede in his favorite place, and with her brother made the day even more special than it already was. 

That’s the power of unfiltered, honest love. That’s the connection a birthday brings whether you’re 4 or 56. And that’s why having these moments, recording them, and sharing them is so special. 

Happy birthday babacigim. 


Becoming a PM, Uncategorized 0 comments on Starting with questions

Starting with questions

It’s very easy to see when there is trust in a culture/community/unit – people start with questions. 

The opposite is true as well. When there is no trust – people start with solutions. 

The reason that questions signify trust is that asking questions brings both parties into the topic without the need for defense. These questions often start with why did we assume, or why didn’t we assume. 

Solutions assume that there is some clear and present gap in the current status that requires immediate correction. They also don’t allow the questionee to share the framework they’ve built with the questioner. 
Usually though, those that start with solutions also come in with unaligned assumptions. And that’s where the true breakdown is. Because when assumptions, objectives, and agendas aren’t aligned and the conversation centers around how to fill specific gaps and holes, you don’t  build trust, you debate execution. 

 So I say lets get better at starting with questions.