onvural.net – melih – family man

Look at that somersault!


Micky was out of town for business (I can’t say why because it’s still a secret), and so a lot of posts this week have been about the kids. It’s been an awesome week of being loved by them, and I’m ending the week in a place of real zen.

I’ll close the week out with the video below of Amelia doing a forward somersault. The pride in her face. The insanity of the fall. It’s a good moment from a good week of being in parent mode full time.



Babies at the office


The babies came to the office today since Genevieve was out sick. It’s usually a lost day when that happens, but this time around they were really fantastic. I got a bunch of help from Lauren and KFox which epically made the day better. Without them, it would have been a totally lost day, but they came to my rescue big time.

We got to the office a bit on the later side since organizing and getting them out the door is difficult.

First meeting was with Betsy, and the kids had a fat section of the whiteboard. There was a section that said “Do Not Erase”. Of course they both wanted to draw and erase there. Sorry Badri…

I pulled off two interviews, a partner meeting, and a 1:1 (thankfully Byrne was good with going to the park). The kids woke up from their nap in the middle of the partner meeting, and there was a mad dash to turn on Finding Nemo before we reached full meltdown.

We ended with grilled cheese sandwiches, a quick bath, and a really easy bed time. They were really heroes. One of those days where I realize how lucky I really am.

Amelia's self-built couch

Amelia built this couch out of pillows for her and Luka to climb on.


A back up needs a back up


The nanny got sick today. We don’t have a back up plan. Burned…

Parenthood teaches you very quickly to expect that your back up needs a back up. It’s not enough to expect the kid to get dirty. They’re going to get dirty, and then pee through their diaper. One set of back up clothes is never enough.

Same with snacks (you’ll get stuck in traffic, and need a back up plan). Same with diapers

The hard part is that when people are involved it gets harder and harder to have a back up plan. Without having some infinite cash flow to hold folks on retainer, how the hell do you build up a network of nannies and babysitters that make this problem go away?

The real answer is… live close to family. Especially family who are keen to help out with the kids.

But in that we’ve made a pretty big commitment that doesn’t make that easy… we need a back up plan.

The hard part of the back up plan is the kids. They have a routine. They have patterns, favorites, likes, and dislikes. Getting someone caught up on all of this part time feels impossible. Interviewing for nannies is hard. I just don’t know how we pull it off…

I guess we just get them into school πŸ™‚

Long nights; little sleep :-(


I keep missing posts. Right when I’d like to write my post, Amelia wakes up. After getting her back to sleep, it’s 1am. Then I’m too tired to put it together.

Then she wakes up again at 5am, 6am (and if she makes it back to sleep at 7am again).

It’s been really brutal, and I have no idea how to beat it. Micky’s back is out, and so it’s been a very solo affair as well (which only makes it worse). It’s tough to get excited about waking up so many times in the night πŸ™

Anyway, I’ll get back to daily posts this week, but I’ll continue to catch up tonight πŸ™‚

My baby boy is a little man


So it’s finally happening…

My baby boy Luka has started pre-preschool. He gets to the door, waves at the greyhounds, and proceeds to the toys. He doesn’t even look back to kiss us good-bye.


He’s just too brave, and too excited to grow up. He’s so desperate to be where Amelia is, and not get left behind. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him happier than this last week (and that’s saying a lot for Luka).

I guess the time has come for another baby…

Accidental helicopter parent


Amelia wanted to do it herself. I wasn’t ready to let her.

Key ingredients – a scooter, a helmet, and a rapidly beating heart. Mixed together, it’s a cocktail from hell. And I don’t drink to begin with.

So there we were, heading to see the Sloan’s new house. Amelia, wanting to copy everything that Lindy was up to, was on her scooter. I couldn’t let go. She kept asking me to let her do it herself. After some tussling, I let her go to see what would happen… and she road her scooter.

She went downhill expertly. She was able to adjust direction (not very well, but she did it). And she knew the speed she was comfortable with, and stopped the scooter if it went too fast. It’s as if she grew 10 years in front of my eyes.

I know exactly what’s going on, but I don’t know how to fix.

You see, Amelia and Luka are at school (Luka starts Monday), or with Genevieve, for a huge chunk of their week. Micky and I get to be with them for a few hours every morning, and a few hours in the evening. So when it comes to the weekend, and I get to be in full on parent mode, it’s hard for me to realize that they’re not frozen in time.

That where I left them last weekend isn’t where they are today.

It’s somehow conceivable that they would have learned, grown, become more capable, or simply just changed.

It’s a really hard reality check, and it’s proven impossible to pull off.

And so, I’m pro-actively making sure I back off. Letting them run around the playground themselves. Giving them the marker, and watching the chaos ensue. Letting the scooter run down hill. It’s so, so hard, but the smile on their faces is also so, so gratifying.

Luka singing


Luka started singing the “ABCs” today.

Our bedtime routine is quite consistent. The kids tend to watch an episode of Curious George (movie or TV version is a nightly debate). Then, after a bit of a temper tantrum (but less so than before), we head to their bedroom to read, sing songs, and then go to bed.

Our book choices are plenty, but we tend to have the same book over and over again for a few nights in a row. Right now, we’re jamming to “One fish, Two fish”, some Maisy books, and “We’re going on a bear hunt”. Other favorites include anything by Susan Boynton and “Goodnight moon”.

After reading (anywhere from 1-3 books), Amelia turns the light off, and we sing.

The first song is always the “ABCs”, and then we do any variety of “Old MacDonald”, “Baa Baa Black Sheep”, “Itsy Bitsy Spider”, and then we always put the kids to bed to “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star”.

Clearly, through it all, Luka has heard his “ABCs” enough to start to sing it now, and tonight it was super cute. He got to “E”, and then when we joined him he got so embarrassed that he dug his head into the ground.

It was fantastic.

Long may he sing.